I know I don't blog often, but I felt that this is definitely an experience I must always remember. After all, it's not every day that someone offers you a proposal of marriage. (Unless you're a celebrity or famous, which I am not.)
Let me start from the beginning: I was done with my afternoon nap, and my belly growled and threatened to eat my shirt if I didn't feed it. I looked in the fridge, and realized that I need to go grocery shopping. I decided to go to Smith's on 33rd. Off I went! I had no idea what life had in store for me in the next 30 minutes!
I started in the school supplies section. I'm excited to teach some cool math lessons about hyperbolic paraboloids and other cool 3-d stuff and Sierpinski triangles and tetrahedrons and a lot of other things now that the stupid standardized testing is over and we can look at cool stuff. We're going to go on trigonometric scavenger hunts and stare at the sky and play outside and learn about real life math. But I digress. Back to the proposal!
I blow my nose a lot. I like it when it's easy to breathe through my nose. So I headed towards the aisle that has tissues (also fondly known as booger catchers). On the way, I noticed the cereal aisle. I love cereal as a snack. It's like candy. I usually like oatmeal for breakfast, but cereal is a treat for other times. I saw him by the milk. We made eye contact. He smiled, baring his pretty white teeth. As I turned into the cereal aisle, he followed me. He said, "it's no fair you're so tall! And you have such beautiful eyes! There's something about you that just makes me want to talk to you!" And we made small talk for a few minutes. Then he asked me: "can I be your slave?" I explained to him that I don't believe in slavery. "Can I be your friend then?" Sure. Sure, you can be my friend. Smiles, part ways. Head towards the tissues. Back to the mission. Tissues.
But alas! We encounter again near the tissue aisle some minutes later. I jokingly say "hi friend!" And he scurries right over, and says, "are you sure I can't be your slave?" Yes, I'm sure. "Are you married?" No. I'm not. Next thing I know, he's down on both knees asking me to marry him! People walking by stop, and watch in awe! A proposal! In our grocery store! Will she say yes?
No. I don't want to marry you. Run away. Check out time. Forgot to even get food. There's always fast food. Oh, surprise, guess who's behind me in the checkout line? More small talk. Slightly awkward. Run away. Just don't get your groceries. Naw, I'll practice being graceful in awkward situations. After all, I'm standing next to my possible fiance. A man I rejected.
I got some crappy fried food and scurried home, safe and sound. And that is the story behind my first proposal. There you go, kiddos.
